Do you know who you are as a person? Who God created you to be?
It’s really important that you do, because if you don’t, then people will make you believe that you’re who you’re not.
When we talk about rejection, a lot of the time we think it’s someone saying I don’t want you, I don’t like you, and sometimes it’s that, but there’s another type of rejection and I actually think this one is worse. It’s when people pretend to accept you, but then try to change you.
It’s worse because on the surface it seems like they accept you, like they want you, but then they pick at things that are who you really are at your core, and it throws you into confusion which is why it’s worse. That confusion can and usually leads to insecurity if you internalize their rejection. If you crave their approval so much that you believe what they say about you more than what God has said about you.
Sometimes when people do this, they may not know what they’re doing, but sometimes they do. Sometimes people are manipulative, mean, even vile, and they mask it with lies and deceit, the only thing about it is that they forget that people can tell when you’re real and when you’re not.
I know that I’m created for a specific purpose, God had a brilliant thought in His mind when He created me, and He put me in the exact situations I needed to be in to fulfill that purpose. No one else is better than me for my purpose. No one else can fill the space in the earth that I was created for.
When people constantly try to change you, they’re simply saying “I don’t accept you for who you are”. They’re rejecting you, but not outrightly, and sometimes that’s worse because it makes you insecure if you believe that something is wrong with you. I’ve come to learn that there’s nothing wrong with me, and that the person rejecting me is the one that has issues they need to work through, not me. Especially when they’re pretending to accept me, because they need something I have or need me for a reason, but trying to mold me into a role they have in mind.
I’ve learnt to do this, because I know God created a masterpiece, and I won’t insult Him by believing that there’s something wrong with the masterpiece that He created. I didn’t get to this point on my own tbh, I did because I constantly get in the word of God everyday to know what He says about me, and I don’t accept what anyone else says.
I’ve also come to a point where I don’t crave human approval so much that I let go of what God says about me, or let go of what God wants me to do/be. I hope that you reach this point too, and understand that the people God intended for your life to love you, will not try to change you just so you can fit into a role they have in their minds of who you should be. This is especially important in marriage.
Love, Yoma.
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